Reports Celebrity Networth:

The late Steve Jobs took home the same amount in 2011 as he has every year since he returned as Apple CEO in 1998: $1. On the other side of the spectrum, the new Apple CEO, Tim Cook, made $378 million in 2011. He also took home $59 million in 2010. One of the last CEO compensation packages that size coincidentally was given to Steve Jobs in 2000, when he made $600 million. Note that Cook hasn’t seen $378 million added to his bank account yet. He got paid close to $1 million in salary, and the $376 million is the estimated value of the 1 million restricted Apple shares that he was granted. Cook is able exercise 50% of the grant in 2016 and the rest in 2021. So it looks like Apple’s board of directors are betting big and on the long term with Tim Cook.

And now…

This is Ebengregory.com…telling you guess how much money you gotta spend to make more money?

Reports The Urban Daily:

On Monday, January 23rd, Kim will sit next to Kelly Ripa on “Live! With Kelly.” This is a great look, because she will be the first female to co-host with Kelly for the week, which will have all women.

Kim Kardashian is following in her ex-boyfriend Reggie Bush’s footsteps, who co-hosted on January 9th. About her one-day gig, Kim posted this comment on her blog:

I’m so excited to reveal that I will be co-hosting Live! with Kelly, with the wonderful Kelly Ripa on January 23!! I’ve been wanting to share this news for weeks now!! I can’t wait to see Kelly! Xo

And now…

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

And now…the video.

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you they’ll pay the settlement with the TARP bailout money from 2008. But you don’t hear me doe.

And now…episode 2.

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you my friends wanted me to rely a message.

Reports Real Talk NY:

The eruption of shootings from 6 a.m. Saturday to 6 a.m. Sunday left the mayor livid and the parents of three wounded children distraught and angry.

Police said the two dozen victims were shot in 14 separate incidents in Brooklyn, Queens and the Bronx. As of last night, no arrests had been made in any of the shootings.

“These people come with guns and shoot at anyone. They don’t care if there are children around,” said Charles Walters, 53, whose 11-year-old son, Shaquan, was the youngest of eight people wounded early yesterday at a backyard party in the Bronx by a lone gunman.

Shaquan was shot in the right leg and was recovering yesterday at Jacobi Medical Center. A 14-year-old girl was shot in the back and a 13-year-old girl was wounded in the left thigh in the 3:39 a.m. barrage.

Five young men – ages 17, 18, 19, 21 and 24 – were also wounded in the shooting on E. 221st St. in Williamsbridge and taken to local hospitals, cops said. They were expected to survive.

As police hunted for the suspect, who they identified as 17-year-old Oneil Dasilva of Mount Vernon, Bloomberg went ballistic yesterday, demanding stiffer federal gun laws.

The mayor said 24 people shot in 24 hours in the city “is just unconscionable.”

“We cannot tolerate it,” Bloomberg said while speaking at the Christian Cultural Center in Brooklyn. “There are just too many guns on the streets and we have to do something about it.”

New York has the toughest gun laws in the country, but Bloomberg said the city alone cannot stop the onslaught of shootings. “We need the federal government to step up,” he said.

Bloomberg is a co-chair of Mayors Against Illegal Guns and has lobbied Washington repeatedly to beef up gun laws.

The mayor called on all federal politicians, regardless of party, to get on the same page .

“Both ends of Pennsylvania Ave., both sides of the aisle,” he said. “We cannot continue to have these guns in the hands of kids who don’t understand the value of life.”

Overall, gun violence in the city is down 5.9% from last year. As of Aug. 28, 1,123 people had been shot in New York this year, according to the NYPD.

And now…

This is EbenGregory.com…a place where Jesus needs to take the wheel.

Reports This is 50:

According to TMZ, DMX was pulled over in AZ for doing 102 mph in a 65 mph. He was charged with speeding, reckless driving, driving with a suspended license and was later released.

Just last month, X was released from prison after serving seven months for probation violation.

And now…EbenGregory reacts to the news via a series of GIFs:

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you I’m up out this b***h!

I see said the blind man. And now…

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you the robot that’s giving this report needs new batteries.

EbenGregory was like…you are all Based. Except it.

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you the pic says it all. But I ain’t hating.

And now…more n*gga jewelry starring Plies:

And now…EbenGregory will use a series of GIFs to explain how this makes me feel:

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you bruh ruh Plies using the same jeweler as Brian Pumper.

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you that I think we all know what’s in Flavor Flav’s Crystals.

PS, something about watching Flav season chicken while wearing all those “semi-gold” rings is disturbing to me.

EbenGregory was like…if you can’t see the video, here’s what transpired:

Shaunie: So what’s up?

Gloria: Not a whole lot, what’s going on?

Shaunie: Your relationship is perfect, what happened?

Gloria: You think I’m going to tell you? I don’t even like you.

Shaunie: I don’t like you either boo.

Gloria: So why would you care?

Shaunie: Because it’s so entertaining to me, you’re sitting here after your wedding day unmarried.

Gloria: We’re still together and we’re still happy.

Shaunie: Why didn’t you get married?

Gloria: Because we didn’t feel like it.

Shaunie: Oh, you didn’t feel like it.

Gloria: You think I’m going to sit up here and pour my heart out to yall and I’m not even cool with you.

Shaunie: Sweetie, you probably don’t even have a heart…let’s start with that. You didn’t walk down the aisle with the white horse and all that crap you were talking about….I know you didn’t do that.

Gloria: White horse? What are you talking about?

Shaunie: You were just talking a bunch of crap that didn’t happen Boo Boo…it didn’t happen. I just want to know what happened?

Gloria: So what? We’re still good, we’re still happy. No big deal.

Shaunie: Are you?

Gloria: Absolutely, we are fabulous

Shaunie: Really, I can’t tell. You didn’t put on that dress and walk down the aisle because that’s what was supposed to happen.

Gloria: It doesn’t matter if I didn’t put on that dress, I’m still happy. You put on that dress, got divorced and you’re still miserable.

And then…

EbenGregory was like…who knew Shaunie was such a bird. I’m sure this is exactly why Shaq dogged, then dumped her. They should’ve called this show “Boot Camp Wives” cause all these birds eventually get the boot. 6 words: Black women making y’all look bad.

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you that to see your drama clearly is to be liberated from it. But apparently these birds are really blind mice. See what I did there?

And then…Erykah Badu (the mother of Jay’s daughter) was like:

And then…EbenGregory was like: I guess he’ll really be hanging out with Rozay more often.

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you the sad face Diddy picture came from Rap Radar.

Bonus: Jigga Man makes the announcement.

EbenGregory was like…extreme law is often extreme injustice. This was an example of both.

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you that sometimes justice is like a train that is nearly always late.

First…know that ABC has set a scenario in which a white realtor acts racist toward Black and Muslim couples to see what other white folks. And then…

EbenGregory was like…thanks ABC for the hard-hitting journalism reporting on situations we already know about.

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you that this is unacceptable.

Two words: Oz reloaded.

This is EbenGregory.com…a place where you can the birds eye view of the harsh realities of prison – without going to jail.

First…know that ‘ol girl admitted to misdemeanor drug possession and obstructing an officer — and in exchange she must pay $2,000 in fines, complete 200 hours of community service and complete an “intensive” substance abuse program. She will also be on probation for one year.

And then…

EbenGregory was like…but she said she was innocent.

This is EbenGregory.com…telling you to bad TI ain’t a white woman. At least he’s rich so he has a chance right?